Valentine’s Day gifts for geeks

doubleslanketC’mon now, you didn’t think we’d get through February without at least one Valentine’s Day post, did you? I know it’s all a scam thought up by Hallmark to get us all spending money, but well….it’s all a bit of fun really.

Floundering for ideas for the dork you desire? We’ve come up with a few suggestions,

For the cosy couple

Since Valentine’s Day falls on a Sunday this year and Sunday is the day for loafing about, I can’t resist suggesting the Double Slanket, (Firebox.com, £49.95). The big brother of the classic Slanket, it’ll make life a little easier for the newlyweds joined at the hip.

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The Chippendales Diva

The Chippendales Diva

See this chic looking intimate massager on the right? It’s created by the people behind The Chippendales. You know, those thong wearing, baby oil drenched ‘hunks’ who strip for millions of adoring women. I’ll admit, my initial thoughts when I heard about this product was that it would reflect the dance troops style, i.e. cheap... Read

Dork romance: A Mario Kart love song

Dork romance: A Mario Kart love song

You can keep your Marvin Gaye, Westlife and Whitney Houston love songs. This Valentine’s Day, I only want to be serenaded with one romantic jingle. The Mario Kart Love Song The song is a YouTube sensation, written by a gaming fan who incorporates his love for Mario Kart with the object of his desire. Lyrics like “I’ll pause this game,... Read

Kokeshi Japanese Vibrating Massage Dolls

Kokeshi Japanese Vibrating Massage Dolls

See this sweet little Japanese doll on the right? The kind of thing you’d get an elderly relative or a doll collector, right? Wrong. It’s a vibrator. Possibly one of the most discreet vibrators I’ve ever seen, and for once it’s actually quite pretty unlike certain other vibrators I’ve seen recently. The Kokeshi Japanese... Read

Philips Dual Intimate Vibrating Massagers

Philips Dual Intimate Vibrating Massagers

Philips, a brand better known for screwdrivers, TVs, light bulbs and dental care,  have recently been branching out into vibrators with a designer style.  Much more couple friendly then a huge bubblegum pink Rampant Rabbit. The latest addition to the range is the Dual Intimate Vibrating Massagers. The two vibrators have a similar look to one of the... Read

I Rub my Fishie Personal Massager

I Rub my Fishie Personal Massager

The I Rub my Fishie (£17.90) on the right is part of a varied range of waterproof personal massagers based on water based animals. We all know how I feel about basing sex toy designs on the animal kingdom. I can sort of see what they were going for. After all, the duck versions are popular for their inconspicuous look when left on the side of the... Read

Pasante Halo Condoms. Visually pleasing prophylactics

Pasante Halo Condoms. Visually pleasing prophylactics

The contraception market is seriously lacking in decent-looking condoms. Admittedly, it’s not the most exciting thing to use, but it’s pretty essential for obvious reasons. I came across these Pasante Halo Condoms from LoveHoney a while ago. Each pack comes with 18 individually designed condoms. The wrappers include flocked wallpaper designs,... Read

Ann Summers Rose Petal Clit Stim

Ann Summers Rose Petal Clit Stim

When the designers at Ann Summers sat down to design their latest vibrator, I’d imagine the conversation went something like this: “What do girls like?” “Flowers. Flowers and pink” “Right, lets create a vibrator that combines both of those things” The result is the Rose Petal Clit Stim. I saw this floral vibrator... Read

Sqweel Oral Sex Simulator from LoveHoney

Sqweel Oral Sex Simulator from LoveHoney

This thing just looks *wrong* to me. Like a water wheel, but with rubbery pink tongue things where the wooden paddles should be. And that’s pretty much what it is. Put the Sqweel Oral Sex Simulator (patent pending, no less) near your nether regions and you’ll be sitting on a “revolution in orgasms”. Top marks for the punnage... Read

Dinky Rabbit Finger Vibrator

Dinky Rabbit Finger Vibrator

First of all, I need to lay my cards on the table. I hate it when vibrators have little faces etched into them. I understand for some it’s ‘cute’ and there are some legal reasons behind it in Japan, but I don’t particularly want to be faced with a rabbit’s cheesy grin when using a vibrator So already I was off on a bad... Read

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